Monday, October 31, 2011

Bye-bye 1FA, Bye-bye Kilang Ketapi...

Ini adalah monorail betul yg dicipta n di assemblekan oleh warga tempatan n beberapa expatriates n foreign workers. Kilangnya ada di celah2 hutan n semak samun di Rawang. Train ini didatangkan khas dlm 3 warna, biru, hijau n PINK...train drivernye plak..hensem2 n ayu belaka...Kat Kilang ni, selain buat monorail, they all ada jugak jual karipap sedap, n ada jugak segerombolan manusia yg hensem2, comel2 n yg best2 belaka..(ye keee?)

I always have problem whenever I need to say goodbye. I still remember when I was in Darjah 6, i cried a river on my last day..konon2nya sedih sgt lah nak tinggalkan sekolah tu, the teachers n of course the friends.

Then, I cried a river again when I was in Uitm Melaka...konon2nya sedih sgt nak tinggalkan my Pre-Dip class DMC B...

This time, when I want to say bye-bye to my fellow officemate..i tak nangis dah..maybe i dah cry a lot during that miscariage episode...I came to the office last Friday just to do some handover n hugs2 n bye2 here n there..but I was still weak..i've got low my mind was a bit here n there....But, I came out with this poem that i've emailed to..I hope everybody that I worked with...SEB team, SRB team, HRSS team, COMREDs team, etc.. as my final gift to them..

Really enjoy working at that Kilang Keretapi...!

Few months ago, I never think so
To send this email, like those who have sailed
But it seems the day has finally come
For me, to waive my palm

I will remember all the ups and downs
But I will recall only the laughter’s sound
As those memories were rare and different
Coz you all were the ones who make it happened

From viewing CVs and arranging interviews
That was how I got to know some of you
From travel VISA to work permit
That was when I got the chance to get closer to those charming expatriate!
Especially that pink train lover name ROHIT

To those technicians and extrovert engineers
Proud of yourself coz you are the thinkers and doers
Though some time we got sour faces between each other
But most of the time we stand side by side rubbing shoulders!

Just give the best in whatever you are doing
Coz when your parents or kids ask you can proudly tell them
All those stuff about Bogie, Apron, Rolling Stock, T&C, Switches & Signalling
“I am part of the team who make that Monorail moving!”

To Finance Team, Procurement, Marcomm, Legal, Admin & Secretaries
Thank you for kind assistance and make my life like sweet cherries
From PR, PO, TRF, claims, appointments, Form 49 and SAPs
Happiest thing when Admin replenish biscuits and deliver my stationeries!

Dear COMREDS, my red house team
We’re the one who make the rest scream
Winning seldom ...frequently loosing
Without us I don’t think all games will be so enjoying!

Not to forget.. HRSS team
Who always smile and keep on blooming
Who patiently answered my questions and queries
From payroll, entitlement, and also ING

Dear GAME Engineers & those “Fantastic Four”
You’ve touch my heart ever since you walked through that door
I will cherish these whole wonderful years
Next time I’ll see you, you should be wiser and better!

To AUDACIOUS those with great left brain
Please don’t give up, just keep on rollin’
Others may pay thousand just to learn what you do
But you’re so talented, so let’s on that Amp and just be you!

Last but not least, to group of people we called Human Resource
Who always hear me singing from Nirvana, Rihanna to Diana Ross
Thank you for those sweet memories and sharing sessions
I’ve learned a lot, all bunch of lesson

I will miss the most all of you dear friends
And also the coldness of this North Pole, Level 18 branch.
Yeah.. that Google Chat thing which is so interesting
Will you miss my new status every morning?

I hope I’ve done something good to all of you
Maybe not to all, maybe just a few
Hope we can met again another chapter, another part
Very Much Thank You, from the bottom of my heart!

Monday, October 24, 2011

Nur Najmaien Bin Jumaien

Thursday - 20th Ocober 2011

I went to office as usual. Nothing different. But last nite when I was sleeping, I've got this super chill that suddenly attacking my whole body till i shiver. I wonder is this something to do with brownish discharge that i have recently.

I have good lunch with office mate at Milanos, I complaint how my Acceptance of Resignation Letter has been wrong, this and that. Then suddenly when I want to go for Zohor prayer at 3pm, I felt something is not right, I went to toilet and there it was..blood. I stand still in the toilet for about 10 minutes..don't know what to do, trying to calm down myself, try to justify things..I am drop dead pale. I Google about pregnancy and bleeding and 15th weeks and it's written there "any kind of bleeding in pregnance is abnormal.." I panicked.

I've decided to go the time i reached home, it's alredy 4pm and the "gyne" at KPJ Selangor already left. While waiting for Abg Jay to come back, I decided to wait until tomorrow. I thought, it is should be alright...

Friday - 21st October 2011

9am..We went to KPJ selangor, I register myself as 1st time patient. I then met Dr. Siti. I explained to Dr. Siti that I have visited GP for last 2 visits, I showed her my blood test result, I told her, my pregnancy history..then she asked me to lay on the bed to do some scanning.

Then..the grey cloud start covering my head...when Dr Siti start asking weird question.." Pernah tak rasa mcm tak pregnant?" " Pernah tak rasa mcm baby takde?" actually she just trying to figure out how to drop the bomb..." Mintak maaf nak bagi tau..actually baby dah takde..the heartbeat is not there..maybe dia dah takde for 2 days.." Then she start explaining the procedure this n that which frankly speaking I actually hear n understand nothing..

We then checked into the ward..after few calls made seeking help from friends n family to bank in some cash since the amount told to us quite high..Nurses showed me to my room and bed...I try to digest what has happened to me...nurses taking my blood sample, check my bp, check if i have diluted, etc..then only when i catched Abg Jay's eyes.....then my tears drop..

I never thought things can be that bad...or..can i put it this way..i never thought bad things can happen to us. Who am i to say that kind of words, so selfish of me.

They put in some medication, they said the baby will come out by himself, like normal birth..they said they will put in the medication every 3 hours till the baby comes out...I never thought the pain will be that same as labour pain..the contraction...after the first 3 hours, the midwife put in another medication..and the pain was terrible until i ask for pain killer but they said tablet won't work for that kind of pain..they need to jap me at the back..

Then suddenly I felt something coming is like waterbag plop when we want to give birth..and i know the baby has come out. D0c Siti came to check...and ensure the baby and the uri/placenta has properly keluar..n do the procedure which is so painfull to ensure everythinbg in my rahim keluar..semua dah bersih...

I was lucky Abg Jay was always there..I know he was very busy, his phone keeps ringing, he needs to fetch the 2 girls from child care..this n that..but I am grateful he always be there..especially when the doc do the cleaning procedure...Ya Allah..sakitnya..

After the procedure abg Jay balik rumah..with the janin..he called me at 10pm..he told me the baby was in perfect condition, the hand, the legs, everythig were there..and it's a boy...then was when i start wondering what went wrong..and all those questions came to my head.

I SMS abg Jay, and asked him to name the baby. Since we never thought of any, I came up with Nur Ajmaien but then Abg Jay gave him Nur Najmaien.

Saturday 22nd October 2011

I was discharged. I went back. Abg Jay busy with " kebumikan the janin" . Of course we felt very sad. While abg Jay busy kemas rumah, basuh kain, etc..I start analyzing what happened to me. I recall one day Ustaz Sekomi told us during ceramah "pada usia 3-4 bulan, baby dlm kandungan akan ditanya sama ada dia mahu meneruskan hidupnya di dunia atau dia tidak mahu.' I can't remember the exact words but it seems that the baby doesn't want to live. He rather go. Then i start to think.."maybe it was becoz of me, maybe i am not good enough, all the curse to those drivers who cut the line,etc.. then the baby rather go then grown up with this not so good mother.." that thought make me so sad.

Sincerely speaking..I cried for 3 days, then suddenly something hit me on Monday..."Allah wants to remind you, you need to change your life, do more good things, Allah knows best, if let say the baby stay and grown up..and turn to be Monster..who knows..and we're not here to justified God's decision..move on Nani, be better person..At least Nur Najmaein is already 'there' waiting for you and praying for us, Insya Allah.

I am good now..I enjoy this 1 week MC given to me. Though this is not the way i thought i ever spend my last few days with fellow officemate in Sekomi..but Allah knows best.

To those who help me with cash, etc..Thank you very much. And thank you also for all positive words and prayers, we really appreciate it very much. Jazzakallah...

To Nur Najmaein..ibu will always miss you...

Thursday, October 6, 2011

Flipping those pages...

1 place I'll miss the most when i left 1 FA is ....the Popular Book Store (besides JJ, Milanos, n mcm2 tempat lagi..)...too near to our office, bak kata my friend sweet Sophia.."kentut tak hilang bau lagi dah sampai.." too big to left it alone and too inviting to only pass by.

Lately, I have different taste in choosing my book. Dulu, mostly love stories yg meleleh2 air hidung membacanya..or..funny stories...but now still funny but yet more on memoir. And major changes is the year that story happened. During 3 weeks raya 2011 KK trip, I read Billy Brown, I'll Tell Your Mother. I was and i am not sure why i picked this book. Maybe bcoz of the is in black n white. The book is a memoir of a boy name Billy, how he and his family live in London after World War II. How at age of 7, he looked for part time job just for the sake of getting extra pocket money. He started with working part time on Saturday, then he try to work in market on Sunday. The most interesting part, how this young boy looks into all opportunities in front of him, e.g..selling horse shit for Rose garden (budak2 lain sure tak mau..busuk), selling unused fruit boxes for fire wood, selling apple picked from rumah tinggal, etc.etc. The best pat, this book is rather is not normal sad memoir...or kisah sedih kehidupan is different. Try read it..

For those who has adventurous life when u were a kid, you might enjoy this book. But for those who got to spend ur kid's life attending ballet class, piano class, language class....i hope u can understand this book. Apparently, my daughter Juanna just don't get it either. For her.. "why la.. that boy need to do extra work, mak dia tak marah ke..kecik2 lagi dah kerja". Same like she doesn't understand To Kill The Mocking Bird...she just don't get it how come young children can just run across the field, masuk hutan, tangkap burung. She just haven't got chances to enjoy that kind of moment like i did..(of course zaman aku kecik2 takde PS2, internet, bagai) ..sian budak2 zaman skrg.

Now, I am reading The Diary of Young Girl - Anne Frank. This is so true story! It is about Anne Frank, a Jewish girl..(if mak aku tau aku baca buku pasal yahudi..mesti dia berleter...) how she and her family live in secret room they called Secret Annexe just for the sake of saving their lives from German during WWII. The book make us feel the miserable life they felt. 8 of them hiding for 25 weeks++, never go outside, never feel the fresh air breeze, never kiss the rain n never taste the snow flakes for 2 years pluss!! The place is so damp and so dark. In summer it was so hot, in winter it was so cold. And this 14 years old girl has put every words perfectly in her diary, she is so talented..though this book written in Dutch but has been translated into few languages. If you wish to preview the book, you can visit this link

It has complete photo of the family. I haven't finish reading it yet..maybe i can finish it tonight but from the closing n welcome notes of the book, i got to know that Anne died in concentration camp when he was 15. I guess this book makes me lebih bersyukur I don't have go through WWII..but who knows?

Next book...? dah beli dah...a story about black women who work as maid with white families in sounthern US in ke tak? tunguuuuuuu........

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Public Announcement!

Yeaaaa...after almost a year, finally i manage to come back to this lonely is not bcoz i have nothing to say, actually i have a lot but Notes in FB is much easier to key in..using my nokia cap ayam..sambil berbaring2 pun boleh key in...

2011 almost come to the far, there are so many things happened. The most i'll remember is..The Prank on my birthday from my lovely adik2 kilang ketapi and KK trip Syawal 2011..

There is something i would like to announce 3 weeks++ (betul ke..??) pregnant!..ngahhhh..what a surprise...after naqeesya dah 7 years old....alhamdulillahh. Pregnant at 37 is...exciting but a bit tiring..don't call me at 9pm..i maybe dah ternganga kat atas sofa...zzzzzzz...

What else, moving away from this lovely kilang ketapi soon...where? Later i update ye...

How do u like my new blog layout?? I don't know what is there left in my brain..but it looks a bit childish..but i really like it..the font is like my handwriting when i was in secondary school.....(karangan BM of course....kalau paper Physic, Bio or Kimia....the handwriting will be like cacing kerawit..since most of the time i tido dlm kelass....)

Ok..till now first..hopefully i will be rajin to write again soon..